The Life & Trials of Severus Snape
by GodsAngel1
Summary: The title says it all, its all about Snape and his daughter Ainsley
1. Chapter 1

_(I don't own any characters but Natasha and Ainsley and remember everyone, this is a fan fiction story.)_

CHAPTER 1: Raindrops

He fell apart when he realized he had lost her for good. His mind was clouded by the flow of his tears that fell from his face and he could do nothing but sit on the stone floor of the rusty dungeon and wait for the pain to subside. Severus wanted it all to be a terrible nightmare, he wanted his best friend to be back in his embrace and not in the grasp of his enemy. Unfortunately his nightmare was a reality, and as much as he wished it was not true, Lily, the only girl he had ever loved, was indeed as in love with James Potter as he was with her, and they were now engaged.

Severus knew Lily did not like the fact that he was a death eater. She had broken down pleading with him to not follow Lord Voldemort and he had nearly done so, until, she had said she cared for him as her friend. "A friend," he had replied as if it was the saddest word in the world. His heart had stung for that moment and he immediately left without a word. She tried day after day to reach him but had no success. Then he found her letter, buried in a pile of snow in front of his residence, that made his soul take flight as she said the three words he had always hoped she would say to him, 'I love you.' Severus had been so excited he didn't even realize that in fact the letter had been over two weeks old and he rushed out of his home to her door step running though the cold snow with a bright smile on his face. However his happiness was quickly shattered when he learned of the engagement.

She had asked him to come to the wedding when the news was told but Severus knew he did not have the heart to. He loved her enough to respect the fact that she did not love him in the way he would have liked but he could not watch her marry another man. The whole ordeal was the icing on his cake of heartbreak and Severus knew he would not be able to hide the tears from falling down his face as she walked down the aisle to James. The last thing he ever wanted was to give James the satisfaction of knowing he was the better man even though truly he was. With that in mind he thanked her but declined the invitation and with a heavy heart he said goodbye to Lily Evans and the door of their relationship closed for good.


	2. Chapter 2

Natasha Black, cousin of fellow death eater Bellatrix Lestrange stood before Severus in a most shocking form. No one had seen or heard from her in months and now she stood before him alive... and pregnant. At first he had no interest in seeing her, for she always caused him nothing but stress with her constant blabbering about the two of them being together, even though Natasha had several beaus. Then she had told him her reason for arrival had something to do with his master, the dark lord. Now as the two sat face to face Natasha's expression screamed of dread as if she was about to speak of something horrifying. Severus waited patiently for her to begin and after a long deep breath she spoke.

"The dark lord," she began but paused to look down and caress her stomach, "…fathers this child within me."

Severus shot up immediately. "You lie."

"Why would I lie of such things?" she said incredulously.

"You whore! How dare you go and seduce a man such as he. You bedded the dark lord and you have the audacity to stand before me declaring your feelings for me –

"Severus I do have feelings for you," she jumped in, "I admit I seduced him but it was a stupid act to upset Bellatrix. You know how she adores him. Then we ended up alone and the tables turned on me. I saw the look of lust in his eyes and before I could retaliate he…well you know…and I was powerless against him," she explained. "Bella ended up finding out because she overheard me telling Narcissa and she went mad. She drove me out of the house and two weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I've been hiding out with a friend ever since."

The news was a lot for Severus to take in. He sighed and sat back in his car absorbing everything Natasha had told him. It was unbelievable to think Voldemort would bed anyone much less Natasha but the idea was not impossible. As twisted as he might be he was still a man with emotions and desires and he could lust as much as he could hate. The question that now remained was what was to be done of the aftermath of their actions.

"Who else knows of your pregnancy?" he asked.

"No one, you are the first person I have seen since I was cast out," she replied.

"What is it you have come here to ask me?"

"I want," she started but paused once more, "Severus," this time she leaned in and took his hands. He let her without protest as an act of kindness but shifted uncomfortably as he began to feel her warmth.

"Speak your request," he told her.

"I need you to be the father of this child," she said. At that he drew his hands away from her and Natasha's face fell in despair.

"Are you mad?" he replied.

"Severus, please, I can't raise this child alone and I don't want her to become like you know who. I couldn't bare it,"

"Do you realize what you are asking of me? You are asking me to lie and to raise my master's child as my own and take responsibility for it,"

"Her," Natasha said sternly, "look Severus I came to you because you're the only person I trust. I know you can keep my baby safe especially since your one of them. If the ministry found out I carried the dark lord's child they would demand my head, just as they would yours if they knew you were amongst his followers."

"Do you wish to blackmail me now," he said angrily.

"No Severus you are truly the only person whom I can call a friend even though we haven't even had the best relationship. I just need you to help me," she pleaded. The look in her eyes was pitiful and as much as Severus wanted to say no, he couldn't bring himself to it. He didn't know what it was but something in his heart was telling him to take on the endeavor, maybe to fill the void of loneliness that lurked within his soul.

It was then that suddenly the door burst open and Bellatrix strolled in with Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy behind her. Severus and Natasha both stood and Narcissa gasped at her cousin's appearance. Bellatrix took one look at her and laughed and Lucius was simply quiet. "Well well, so you've finally been knocked up. I was wondering when it was going to happen after the countless fools you've been with," Bellatrix said.

"Hello to you to Bella," replied Natasha.

"How astonishing, here we were simply going to pay a visit to dear Severus and we are reunited with our lost cousin. It seems a congratulations is in order, wouldn't you say so Sissy,"

"That depends on who the father is," remarked Narcissa with clear displeasure on her face.

"I… am the father," Severus then spoke in his usually detached tone. All eyes turned to him and he tried not to notice the relieved look on Natasha's face. Lucius and Narcissa were stunned but a wicked grin came upon Bellatrix's face.

"Really," she said flabbergasted, and laughed.

"What is so funny Bella, you know as well as anyone that I've always had feelings for Severus,"

"Of course dear but the feeling has never been mutual,"

"One act of longing on my part has apparently cost me greater than I had anticipated," Severus replied.

"As we all see, but then who else were you going to be able to turn to after your dear Lily -

"Bellatrix," Narcissa cut in before she could finish. Bellatrix smiled innocently but Severus glared at her as a sudden anger began to build up inside of him. He was furious that she dared bring up his lost love and Natasha could see it very clearly. She turned her head away feeling a pain of jealousy but said nothing while Narcissa spoke once more. "It does look like congratulation is in order, unless of course you aren't keeping the child."

"That was the very topic of discussion before you all barged into my home," Severus said with his gaze still on Bellatrix.

"On official business dear Severus, but beg pardon for the intrusion," Lucius spoke.

"Business," Natasha repeated inquisitively. "I wonder then, how our master lord Voldemort is. Does he still speak of me," she said with a smirk on her face. Bellatrix face hardened and she stepped forward and slapped Natasha hard across the face.

"Bloody twat, don't you dare speak his name. You have no right and my lord does not waste his time thinking of low wenches such as yourself,"

Natasha merely laughed. "Still holding a grudge cousin,"

"You should be happy you still hold on to your life," Bellatrix spat.

"Enough Bellatrix," Severus declared. "Any business we have can be settled later. Now I ask you to kindly retreat from this ground."

"Later then, when you no longer have company," said Lucius. Narcissa nodded in agreement. Bellatrix only sneered and looked back at Natasha with disgust. She pulled out her wand and with a flick of her wrist she was gone along with Narcissa and Lucius.

Natasha sighed and sat back down while Severus retreated to the window. He glanced outside to see if all was clear and not a soul was in sight. Natasha waited patiently for him to speak but he said nothing nor did he plan too for he had nothing further to say. Darkness was approaching and Severus knew it wouldn't be long until his master sent for him to take on his next assignment. If he was going to act as the father of Natasha's unborn child he needed her to be far away from him as possible where his master could not notice her, for if he knew of her pregnancy he might suspect the child to be his and then things would not look good for either of them. To lie was seen as an act of betrayal and to betray Voldemort meant death. Severus was not frightened of Voldemort but death was not on his agenda nor did he plan to have that changed.

While Severus continued with his silent thoughts Natasha wondered what was going on inside his head. Severus was never an easy man to figure out which was one of the reasons she was so attracted to him. She liked the fact that he was unpredictable even though he appeared to be the very opposite. She knew people underestimated him and that fact seemed to make him far more cunning and brilliant than he already was. For years she had been jealous of his love for his childhood friend Lily especially since she was a part of another house. She always figured it would be easy trying to sway his attention over to her, but despite all of Natasha's efforts to get him to feel something for her other than contempt, his devotion continued to remain with the vibrant Gryffindor belle and even now they still did even though he would no doubt deny it. Holding back tears Natasha stood and made her way to the silent dark figure. Reluctantly she reached out to place a hand on his shoulder but just before she could reach him he moved away from her and back over to the seat he had previously occupied.

Natasha did not move and Severus did not look her way. His eyes were cast down and his mind went into a deep trance. In a few months from now he was to be a father and while a part of him wanted to cry tears of joy the other part could only think of the sorrow of the fact that it was not Lily's child he was sharing. Severus had always dreamed that their lives would be different, that Lily would be with him instead of James and that together their love would create a child, a daughter, so perfect that not even the darkness could prevail over her. She would have beautiful deep blue eyes like Lily with rosy cheeks and dark hair like him. She would be theirs and they would name her Ainsley. However the reality was nowhere near the dream he had long hoped for. Instead he was alone, Lily was with another, and he had just agreed to father the child of a woman because of her mistake with his master. He knew nothing good could come out of this for him and surely one day the truth would be known to all, even the child. Yet despite it all, he would still take on this responsibility.


End file.
